Funny

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Sunday afternoon I went to the dog park with China to escape the oppressive heat that my apartment had collected throughout the day. We spent about an hour and a half lounging in the shade before I took China and headed to my car. As I was loading her in, a lady, about 50 years or so carrying a mat and a bag approached me.

"Could you give me a ride up the street? I'm really late for my yoga class."

Me: "Uhh.. "

Her: "What direction are you going? I'm headed towards Shattuck."

Me, not thinking fast on my feet: "I'm going towards North Berkeley (?)"

Her: "Oh, that's perfect!" (doh!)

Me: "Well.. ok, I guess" I figured if she tried to kill me China would be on her so fast she wouldn't know what hit her.

So, I made small talk with a stranger as we drove towards her destination, being very aware where my purse was, what valuables I had, and where her hands were.

Me: "So do you teach this yoga class?"

Her: "No."

Me: "Oh."

Well, she was nice enough. I dropped her off at the corner and she thanks me graciously. Then points her finger at me and lectures, ".. and don't you ever pick up another stranger again!" Amusing.

What the.

It's a wierd time of the month for me. I managed to do laundry this weekend, but the rest of my apartment is a mess and I haven't done much else. My clothes are still lying, unfolded.. and the really nice silverware set I purchased is sitting on my kitchen counter half-opened. Most of yesterday was spent consoling China who wasn't taking very well to the early July 4th-revelers out in the street cracking capguns into the air and shooting rockets. She spent the evening shivering on the couch next to me with her head on my lap, or attached to my hip as I walked around the apartment.

Saturday evening was spent at the Lipizanner Stallion Show with Merima and Laquel who indulged my horsey craziness by coming with me and listening to my childish squeals of delight. EEEeee! Photos to come. I remember when I was a kid playing with my My Little Pony dolls and scouring through my Horse books that I was convinced one day I'd have a Lipizanner horse. Now I have Isabella.. who is eons more beautiful than any of those stallions. ;)

I purchased some golf clubs. I'm slowly turning into a yuppie.

Yesterday I attended an ex-coworker's BBQ she was having for her 1 year old baby. One of my other ex-coworker's husbands approached me and asked me, "So Julienne - where is your uh.. fiance?" I told him I had none, that we broke up over 2 years ago.. and he replied, "Oh.. so no boyfriend?" Umm.. nope. I'm a eunuch.

Poop seems to be the topic of most conversations these days.

Julienne: where is amit
Walt: I do not know
Amit entered the room.
Julienne: fucko
Julienne: oops
Amit: haha
Walt: he's probably watching porn at work
Walt: there he is
Julienne: I wish I could
Walt: I do!
Walt: muhahahahaha
Walt: in fact
Walt: I am watching porn right now
Julienne: gross
Julienne: never talk to me when you're watching porn
Julienne: that goes for both of you!
Walt: but I do it all the time :(
Walt: also while I'm taking a dump
Julienne: :'(
Julienne: oh lord
Walt: it helps to pass the time
Amit: get it? "pass the time" ?? haha
Julienne: :-/
Walt: I'll be taking a dump in the bathroom while watching porn from the living room while talking to you, is that wrong?
Amit: it's wrong if you're doing it in the tub
Julienne: HAHAHA
Walt: yes
Julienne: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Amit: yes
Amit: oh man
Julienne: or on your couch
Julienne: and throwing it in the bathroom
Amit: no that's fine-- a black ikea couch-- no one will know
Julienne: poop is brown
Amit: oh yeah
Walt: remember how my couch is hollow?
Julienne: sometimes yellow sometimes green
Julienne: sometimes speckled
Walt: I could install a septic system in there
Amit: that's awesome!!!!!
Julienne: dude
Walt: I wouldn't even have to get up!
Julienne: you should
Walt: it will be like homer's recliner toilet
Amit: very simpson-esque
Julienne: like the man show
Amit: you can make a dorito and soda milkshake
Julienne: ...

Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank Hooobastank

Cool word.

I love this song..


I wanted you to know
That I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph
And I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Because I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

The worst is over now
And we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high and steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn
And no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone

Seether

Normally I would ignore the spam mail that innundates my inbox, however the following two subjects I couldn't resist:

"Julienne, your Girlfriend will thank you BIG TIME!"- perhaps this means Merima, but she's more of my hooka than my Gfriend. ;) There was a penis enlargement advertisement inside.
"mating ritual midwives living with 67"- this one intrigues me.. it sounds like some sort of midwest based cult. Oh yeah, 67 what?? It left me in suspense so I opened it up and read this: When class action suit about leaves, grand piano around laughs out loud.beyond light bulb is chic.Unlike so many clocks who have made their chic clodhopper to us.

It's the friggin Al Queda I tell you. They're sending secret messages to their US Coherts via spam engines. You think I'm kidding!!

Laquel invited us to her family's BBQ on Sunday which was INSANE as far as the amount of food offered. At one point before the BBQ I asked her if there were going to be ribs and she retorts, "Honey, this is a black BBQ of course there are gonna be ribs". Hehe!

Tonight I ride. There was an Oakland Hills endurance ride this weekend at Redwood Park, where Isabella is boarded, and she became quite riled up at the site of the horses running past. She remembers our competitions and she wants to join them.. I went to read ridecamp, a message board I used to be pretty active way back when to read about people's stories about this weekend and I had to stop after a few stories. I really really miss competing.. yearning for something so badly is quite anti-zen, but I can't help wanting to go. I yearn, I crave, I want. Isabella is getting in better and better condition, although her feet aren't quite as up to par since she's not in pasture anymore. If we were to compete, I'd have to put boots on her to protect her from any rocky terrain depending on which ride I chose.. and that would nix any CTRs since they don't allow boots which cover the pasterns, unless I used foam-on EZ boots which are a pain in the ass to remove and put on. (if you understood or even read all that, I give you props) ARGH I want to go. I need to chose a date later this summer and do it. It'd be the first time by myself.. unless I could drag Mark out or one of my friends willing to get dirty and willing to help pick up horse poop and cart water all over the place. Yep. I need to chose a date.

Setting: Berkeley Marina, Saturday afternoon.

I will remember this day always. The day Merima did me doggy-style out in public.. it was wonderful. Afterwards we both ended up on our backs, looking up at the sky breathless and giggling.

Okay, I'm kind of getting squiggy so I'll stop that line of thought. What really happened:

I went with Merima to rollerskate along the Marina. I hadn't gotten on my rollerskates since I was about 9 years old, so I was a bit nervous about it all.. especially since we'd be going a little bit of a distance - Emeryville and back. After a few minutes, I was still a little wobbly, but getting the hang of it all. We picked one of the windiest days to go, which made everything a little more challenging, but I was suprised at how easy it was to get the hang of everything again.

Coming back about 100 feet from the car, I heard a rattling going on in my left skate. We stopped and I checked out my wheels... everything seemed intact. Puzzling. We continue on to the car and about 20 feet later it happened. My brake fell off, tripping me in front of Merima who attemped to grab me. I have to thank her for her valient effort, but alas, I fell, bent over in front of her in a lewd position. She proceeded to trip over one of my skates as I fell and tumbled over on top of me and out into the middle of the path. We both fell down laughing uncontrollably for about 5 minutes. I don't know what it is about your friends falling that's so funny, but when you both fall, that's pretty friggin hysterical. We must've looked quite the sight to the I80 traffic waiting to get into San Francisco. Luckily we both had padding, so the injuries were minimal. My leg looks like it had an unfortunate encounter with a mad feline.

Today we go to Laquel's family BBQ and tonight I make dinner for Mark.. little brother sister bonding sans naked poker sex (take *that*, GOOGLE!)

This article is a bit disconcerting. Particularly because I ride Isabella at the same park. The mountain lion was spotted on the East Ridge Trail, and I frequent the West Ridge Trail often. Eeek. Scared.

My coworker dragged me out to hit at the driving range close to work today. They have a lunchtime special of a basket of balls and a sandwich for $8. Woohoo! It was the second time I had ever played.. the first being in Korea years and years ago with my dad. I discovered I'm freakishly good at driving the ball down the field. My coworker thinks its the Korean genes in me since a lot of the women on the LPGA are Korean.

So, he's trying to convince me to buy a set of clubs so I can go out to play with him and other coworkers in the evenings and weekends. Did you know a set of mediocre golf clubs costs around $300???? Who the hell knew they were so expensive. Anyways, I'm considering it now that I found out the actual amount my severance overpayed me was by $3500, not $9000. Whew. If I do get a set, I want them to be EXTRA girly and frilly so I embarrass them whenever we go out to play.

A heart-to-heart conversation between sisters:

Julienne: Cuz I"M RICK JAMES, BITCH!!
Lizette: woah
Lizette: my washable maxipads are cool
Julienne: YARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR'
Lizette: hahahah
Julienne: do you smell them ?
Lizette: no, i soak them in tea tree oil so they dont smell bad
Julienne: if china were there would you let her smell them?
Lizette: yeah she can totally smell them if she wants she'll prolly rub her face in it
Julienne: if I were there would you let me smell them??
Lizette: you could totally smell them, but do it in private
Lizette: and dont tell me
Julienne: hokay
Julienne: hooorayyyyyy
Lizette: you can rub your face in it too.. with china
Julienne: i'll use it as blush.
Lizette: blush and fragrance in one
Julienne: and lipstick.
Julienne: mark says you're gross
Lizette: and eye shadow
Julienne: i'm talking to him on the phone
Lizette: hahaha mark's there?
Lizette: oh

The weekend began Friday night when Amit, Merima and I went to Jonga House in Oakland for some yuuuumy Korean food. It was Merima's first time eating Korean food and it was soooo good. Finally, a good Korean restaurant in the East bay. Afterwards we had a few drinks at Thallassa. Even though I still sucked, I could see a little bit of improvement in my pool playing.

Saturday morning I went for a ride on Isabella, and in the afternoon I was so tired I took a nap which left me a bit cranky in the evening, which wasn't that great because Amit, Merima, Laquel and I had planned on attending Thump Radio at the DNA Lounge in our most hootchiest outfits (well, except Amit who would be pimpin us all out). I didn't have a hootchie outfit, per se, so I wore my black corset top and chandelier necklace, with a knee-length skirt and my knee-high boots. Quite a few people approached me that night, including 2 girls.. one of whom couldn't stop looking at my chest in the bathroom. One of the guys who approached me used the pickup line: Hey, I don't want to offend you or anything, but you have really nice breasts.

Very smooth.

Once I had a Red Bull I was in a better mood that evening. I was more of a spectator than dancer because jumping up and down in my boots was annoying. It was fun watching people dance and the DJ spin.. I love the layout of the DNA Lounge, with the balconies that you can peer down and people-watch.

Hmm.. what else. Isabella's sponsor had her first time with Isabella alone yesterday.. seems like everything went well, yay! I was overpaid on my severance by $9K so now I have to pay that back (arg). And that's it for now.

Hey go look at Lizette's pictures for pictures she took when she visited me in Berkeley!

Anyone want a gmail account? I have 4 invites left. "Special/kinky favors" encouraged.

I found a sponsor for Isabella, yay! This means I can be rest assured when I can't come out to see her everyday that she's in capable hands. It puts a lot of pressure off my chest to know that someone will be taking her out, and maybe even make her a better horse by exposing her to a different rider.

It's been busy at work, but not too bad. Eye candy also helps. ;)

Argh! I flicked two bugs off my computer screen a few weeks ago and both of them left interesting flick marks on my screen. I left them there because the marks looked kind of cool, and now that its to a point where the smears are kind of annoying, they won't come off! What's the dealio!?

Wouldn't it be wierd if a mutant hair follicle developed inside someone's stomach and grew down miles and miles of intestines and finally when that person went to go to the bathroom it came out and they tried to pull it out but the hair follicle was so thick they'd puncture their stomach if they pulled it out and so they left it and tied it around their leg everywhere they went? Wouldn't that be wierd?? I don't know where that came from.

Drunk donky cart driving. Don't do it, you can't afford it.

I love that Verizon commercial with the group of college roommates and the one guy that starts an office job. He's talkin' to his boss and gets a phonecall, "Guess how many cookies I have in my mouth". He goes, "Uhhh... 6?" before looking at his boss and hanging up the phone. Hehe!!!

So, Lizette and Mom left in the morning after a fun-filled 4 days visiting. Here's a synopsis of activities:
Sat: Dinner at Zao, Harry Potter (which ROCKED!!! so much better than the first two and I looooved the first two!)
Sun: Visited Isabella, BBQ at Amit's with the gang, walked around Telegraph, Perfect Circle concert.
**must digress here to talk about Perfect Circle. I went with Walt, Merima, and Lizette.. I had never been to a 'hard rock' concert before and we were on the floor with mosh pits breaking out all around us. Oh man, we had so much fun.. dodging sweaty guys, throwing our water cups into the mosh pit, rockin out to Maynard. Good times
Mon: Wine tasting and food sampling in Sonoma. We started off at Viansa which is my favorite winery - lots of food sampling.. mmm.

I miss my family so much!! *cry* Lizette, Mark, and mom have been cruising around Ensenada this week.. I tired calling them last night but they weren't picking up their phones. Poop. They'll be driving up to visit me tomorrow and for the next 4 days we'll be touring around N.California and most likely I'll be sick of them by Tuesday.

Tomorrow I'm meeting with a gal who might lease Isabella.. it would help me out greatly to have someone else who can go out and check on her. I hope it works out... *crosses fingers*

Support your local kimchee makers!

Hooray for Smarty Jones!!! Sending good vibes to him at Belmont this Saturday.. go little brown horse, go! :) The Triple Crown's so close you can taste it! Wheee!!

Whoa! I haven't been updating at all. Serves you all right, none of youz update anymore.. I surf to your pages everyday and what do I get? Nuttin'! Poopy!!

Anyhow, I've been immersed in horsey stuff after work. I've been going to see Isabella everyday. Now that she's in a stall I feel guilty otherwise.. on Saturday I'll be meeting a lady who'd like to sponsor her, so I won't have to make the trek everyday to look after her in the future. I've been living/breathing horseworld, but I'm not complaining.. it's great to see my horse so often. She's lost a bit of weight adjusting to the new place, but she had a bit of chunk on her to begin with, so now she's looking more normal.

I haven't worked out since Friday since I've been riding Isabella everyday. The last time I ran my arches puffed up and cramped (I'm flat-footed) so I'm a bit hesitant to start running again. Using my elliptical is easy enough, so maybe I'll start that up again tonight.

Last night I had sushi and gelato with Merima. Sushi never tasted so gooooood.. mmmmmmmmmmm.... yes, spicy tuna, how I love thee. Sushi is heaven on earth.

*does a little victory jig* Woohoo! I roXorZ.

(following was a letter I sent to Andrea, hey it doubles as a blog entry)

The move went smoothly. I'm glad a lot of people weren't at the barn cuz I would've started crying! Actually I did while I was driving away.. I'm going to miss Creekside.. :(

Isabella was awesome on the drive and unloading, she was very quiet and everyone at the new place fawned over her (after all, she *is* the most beautiful horse in the world..) She arrived at the new barn and I put her inside the indoor arena and she just watched me for a while unloading my gear, then went to roll.. she lied there on her stomach watching everything for a while which concerned me (thinking colic), but everyone else seemed to think that she was just cooling off and was relaxed. The people at the new barn are so incredibly helpful and nice. A lot of people went out of their way to make sure we were settling in okay which was very nice (they all seem older, semi-retired folk). People are ultra-clean (opposite of me) and there are a few strict barn rules to follow, but it seems most people that arrive at that barn are there for years and years (we're talking 30+!).

We went for our first ride yesterday and I think Isabella thought we were at a competition ride because she was RARING to go.. all ansty and excited. We rode for about 3 hours and the trails are beautiful.. redwood trees everywhere, very shady and lots of hills. She was great on the trail and seemed to enjoy herself and China came along with us. The trails are really busy with people though.. there are a lot of runners and bikes coming around the blind turns which spooked Isabella a little bit.. she'll have to get used to em. When I came back to the barn, people were worried I had gotten lost because I spent so long out there. :)