Matt and I have had some amusing moments together. He's a funny (and hot) boy..

First incident that sticks out is the morning we left LA to drive back to Berkeley. Mom, Lizette, Matt and I went to breakfast first at a local diner, filling our stomachs with eggs, sausage, hash browns, ham, and pancakes before the ride home. I *love* *love* breakfast! However, 9 times out of 10 after a greasy morning meal like that, I go diarrhea. My stomach just can't handle rich foods that early in the day. :( Anyways, I'm driving first and about 1 1/2 hours out of LA, I start feeling a little queasy. My stomach starts gurgling and telling me that things will be moving along asap VERY SOON. The smell of the big flab of ham and slices of bacon we had leftover aren't helping at all.

Me: Ugh, I don't feel so good...
Matt: What's wrong, baby?
Me: My tummy..... uhhhhg... the smell of that food is making me feel sick. Can you throw it out?

I expected Matt to hem and haw about littering on the freeway or whatnot, instead I was answered by an enthusiastic:

OOOOHhhhKAY..!!!! :)

Matt schemed for a while about the best way to do it. He shared his thoughts with me..

Matt: I can't make it look like I just threw it out the window. I have to make it look like an accident.
Me: *groan tummy hurts..* Okay..
Matt: Hmmmm............

He holds the ham and bacon on his lap and opens the window fully. He stares nonchalantly at the road ahead like a good little law abiding motor vehiclist, and with a flick of his wrist, the ham and bacon were defenestrated (haha, I used that word in my blog!) onto Interstate 5. I look in the rear view mirror and see the ham bounce away..

We had a good laugh about the ham, imagining it being smacked into some unbeknownst passerby's windshield. I don't think throwing ham out the window could ever *not* be funny..

Anyways, I held my burning loins (not burning in the good way) through the length of the grapevine and exited off to the first gas station we could find. Matt went off to find more luxurious accommodations for his stint on the can at a nearby Holiday Inn, but I couldn't wait that long. I HAD TO GO. The gas station bathroom was insanely grody and as soon as I sat down to go in one of the three stalls available, a huge Mexican extended family came and joined me in the small confine. How unlucky for them. And I so finally, I got to poop liquid.

The End.